Move in a Healthy Direction Towards Growth
Try again —
It’s not about getting away from your problems, it’s about adapting to change and moving in a direction that is healthy for your growth. For a long time, I thought the opposite. I hated certain situations I was in and would always give a negative reflection of the circumstances. It engulfed every aspect of my life. I soon became a hermit, I couldn’t look people in the eye, and I hated talking because for most of my life it felt like people didn’t want to hear what I have to say and when they did go against what I said. So eventually I just snapped, It became hard to get a job and let alone keep one, I hated communicating even if for little things. I hated asking for help because I felt like a burden. I hated showing emotion because I was tired of not being taken seriously. I was tired of being made fun of. I didn’t know how to change, or what to do and to this day I still don’t. Of course, I felt suicidal and just wanted someone to accept me and look at me as the opposite of a burden, it just felt like no matter how hard I try or how much effort I put in nothing was working out. I’ve started over so many times in my life I can’t even count and when I get to what feels like the end I always get that one voice that comes out of the darkness and mosquito-infested mesh to tell me to keep going and I’ll eventually find what I am after, except, I don’t even know what I want, I just know I am tired of being miserable and lied to. I am writing this because, well, I guess it’s time to start over again and try something new.
